The New Creative Hat = SHORT HAIR!

I'm heading to the salon for the first time in a year and a half.

This is a BIG deal folks. Around here, I barely get a shower, nonetheless a haircut.

We've been running around all day, I just left Ryan and with the kids dealing with an issue in the middle of the AT&T store, and I can't wait to relax. It's been really wintry weather (So Cal Winter) and I feel so thirsty, my skin is dry, and my lips are chapped.

I can't go to the salon like this. They will think I don't care about myself and I'll probably end up with a tawdry old mom haircut.

I look in my purse, I've got some lotion for my hands (thank goodness) but no chapstick. Seriously? What has my life come to? Forget lipstick or mascara, I don't even have any chapstick?

In the back of the car I have Rubbermaid bins with wipes, diaper cream, sunscreen, owie cream, spare clothes, hats, socks, and more. But I don't have chapstick.

Seriously Suzanne, take a minute and think about this. You need to start taking care of yourself!
I know this. I know I should spend more time on myself. But, well, it's just that, um, I have, well... TWO kids and a husband. They need me to take care of them. To make their lunches and snacks, to keep spares and extras of everything in the back of the car so they never go without what they need. But maybe, just maybe I could try and figure out how to bring a few things for myself as well? We'll see how it goes.

Next time I go to CVS I'll pick up some chapstick, maybe even some lip gloss. And this goes for all you girls out there. Buy yourselves a two dollar chapstick, it's okay, really!

If you're wondering what I did at the salon....... well, I went a bit crazy. After a 3 minute conversation with the stylist where certain words out of her mouth were "matronly" and "tired" I said GO FOR IT. Chop it off!

So, Josselyn chopped off my 18 month old frazzled mom hair and replaced it with something stylish, easy, and fun.

And it feels GLORIOUS!

The NEW look... with my creative hat on... :)

replaces the old pony tail. Yahoo!

My New Love

Oh Baby, where have you been all my life?

When I pair you with three delicious ingredients...

Sugary Deliciousness...
Instant Caffeine... a la Trader Joes

Rich Vanilla Almond Milk....

Frothy, foamy, better than Starbucks...... I am in LOVE!

I Write To Be Happy

Writing, for me, is as much a necessity as chocolate. or lip gloss.

it's just one of those things that I have to do. to stay alive. to stay sane.

to understand myself and my own emotions.

it is how I get through difficult times, and it is how I celebrate joyous times.

I am more me when I write than any other time.

I'm not a speaker, I'm never the life of the party. I'm the quiet observer.

I take it all in, I process, and I write. I go through my daily life as mom and wife, and at the end of the day I can't rest until I've released a little bit of that energy through writing.

I am Suzanne Jeanette. I just turned 30 years old. I'm a stay at home mom to two wonderful little boys, and a wife to my tech-geek husband. I love my family. They keep me laughing every day, and they are my reason for being.

I have three goals for this blog:

1. To share my thoughts and ideas with anyone who will listen.

2. To meet and inspire other writers and moms who can relate to my thoughts.

3. To help other moms like me understand that we can find ways to do things for ourselves every day - caring both for our bodies by giving them what they need, and our minds by doing the things we love to do, and involving our children throughout the process.

I stumbled upon a quote about a year ago:

Be gentle with yourself. You are a child of the universe, no less than the trees and the stars. In the noisy confusion of life, keep peace in your soul. - Max Ehrmann

It really sums up what I am trying to get at. We need to be gentle with ourselves. We need to realize that we too are delicate beings that deserve to be cared for. We need to make the time we need to care for ourselves. Find an outlet, and show our families what we love to do. Get them involved. Make the time we need every day to do the things that keep us happy and inspired. That is why I started this blog. Because I need to write to be happy.

What do you need to do to be happy?

I used to have a pile of notebooks next to my bed. I wrote poetry, stories, and free writes about whatever was on my mind at the time. These notebooks got me through high school and college, through my journey from adolescence to adulthood, through a period of depression and anxiety, and through my early dating years. They helped me realize who I was and who I wanted to be. Now, those notebooks are in a nice little box in the attic. Now, I blog. All my thoughts, ideas, and emotions are here for you to see. I hope you like what you see.

Celebration Brownies

About a month ago we had a tornado cause damage in our back yard.

Last Wednesday I made a meatloaf.

Then, I saw a pig fly.

Last night, a cow jumped over the moon.

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True Story
(Ok. The pig and the cow were in a cartoon and a book. But the rest are true.)

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There is one more thing, though, even more unbelievable and amazing .... that I want to holler from my rooftop. MY rooftop, people! OUR rooftop!

We are HOME OWNERS!

I was so excited that I made Ryan some Celebration Brownies.

Valentines Day 2010

You might think I'm just way too mushy-gushy when I say this, but seriously - this year... Best Valentine's Day Ever.

There were no chocolate hearts, no red roses, no jewelry, and no cheesy cards. Now, I am not anti-Valentines day in the least. I love this holiday! Ryan and I have had many dates at expensive restaurants, I've received my share of roses, and we've done the candy thing over and over. It was always wonderful. But this year, it was more than wonderful. It was magnificent!

We woke up really early, drove the kiddos to Westlake, picked up breakfast at the Corner Bakery, and took it to a nearby park. The park was empty except for some dog walkers, so we got to play with the boys, eat our breakfast, and enjoy the 80 degree sunshine of Southern California. We felt so lucky to be sharing the morning with our kids. Later on, Lucas got some time away with Gramey and Grampy, so we took Nathan out with us for lunch at In N Out and a couple quick errands. We all came home and had a quiet evening together. What could be better? I'll take our valentines day over diamonds, any day.

Ugh... and other random thoughts.

My blog has turned into a photo gallery of my kids. I'm not sure if that's okay. Is it? The lack of sleep and continuous whining, shouting, crying, and feeding is getting to me. I think my brain has shrunk, and the only tid bits of conversation that I can squeek out are something along the lines of "Nathan hasn't pooped in four days", or "Did you see the seseme street episode where....?". Seriously. This is what my life has come to.

As I sit here, my eyes are burning from being up late last night, and up twice after that to feed Nathan. Lucas is sleeping, after we just spent a half hour in the car listening to the one calming song on our kindermusik CD over, and over, and over again. I am craving chocolate, but trying to use my blueberry green tea to help me over come the intense need. Nathan is sleeping too, in his car seat by the front door where I left him when we got home. This is the first moment of complete quiet I have had in at least a week.
Ahhhh, I am trying to enjoy it.

I had a dream last night that I was trapped underground and couldn't get out. There were all these tunnels and it was so hard to get through them. I finally got to one that had a very small opening to the outside world, and I just stayed there, calling for help. There were a lot of other people trapped too, but Ryan, Lucas, and Nathan weren't there. When we finally got out I was hugging the rescuers over and over again, and then I woke up. At least I got rescued before I woke up! What does this have to do with anything? I don't know. But this is how my brain works lately, going from one random thought to another - Nathan is crying, gotta feed him, Lucas wants his smoothie, gizmo is meowing at me because it is raining and he wont' go outside for his food, I need to pack Ryan's lunch, did I remember to brush my teeth yet, when is the auto insurance due again? Somehow among all of this, I manage to keep my kids clean, fed, safe, and warm, and myself somewhat pulled together, but I can't seem to sit and keep a train of thought long enough to write about it. This is a rare moment, I think.

If it isn't already obvious, I am having a hard day. Yes. I am whining. I am tired. I am crabby. And I just want someone to take care of me for a change. I want to sleep all night long. I want the first shower in the morning. I want to have somewhere important to go. I want dinner cooked for me, laundry folded for me, and the house to magically be clean all the time. Waahh wahhh waaahhhhh.

Ok. I'm done. I will stop whining. It's not productive, and well, Nathan is awake. Sooo.... On with my day!

How's that for a well organized and composed blog post?! :-)

New Year's Resolutions 2010

December 2009 has almost come to and end, and the new year is just around the corner. I have been thinking a lot about resolutions in the last few weeks. Last year I wrote some, intended to follow them all, and only followed a few. I think that is pretty good, considering our lives took an unexpected turn in January with the news of Nathan's upcoming arrival.

This year, I am hoping will be different. It will be busy, of course. Full of firsts for Nathan and lots of activities for Lucas, lots of hard work for Ryan, and me, well, I'll just be trying to help everyone manage it all. Hopefully I can squeeze a little me time in as well.

Here are my resolutions this year...

#1. Eat Better! Myself, and the whole family. And while we're at it, get some exercise too! (yeah, yeah, we all say this, right?! well, I need to actually do it. more veggies and whole grains, less sugar and processed snacks)

#2. Blog more regularly. (this one is a big one for me, blogging is my "me" time... writing is my passion and I want to spend more time doing this for myself)

#3. Less clean up, more fun! (I want to focus less on taking care of the house, and more on playing with the kiddos. Lucas plays so well by himself that I sometimes take advantage of it, and spend all our time cleaning or doing housework. I want to have more one on one time with him doing fun activities, learning new things, and more.)

#4. Recycle, re-purpose, re-use, or re-sell.... instead of storing it in the garage. (I want to have less junk sitting around, and want to get rid of it in the best way possible!)

#5. Shop online or outside rather than in-store. (i.e. farmers markets, garage sales, amazon, etc...this will save me gas, time, and money!)